Dear Lizzie (26 Nov 25),

Dear Lizzie

So lovely to get your letter. I feel like we are at the opposite ends of mothering except that your baby and my 22 year old have both just made steps towards independence, E giving up “Nigh” and T moving out of home. I’ve been left in the wake of this sudden decision and whilst I know it is an amazing step forward in her life and like E she is a different, happier person, I’ve needed and minute. I think the safety of T’s bedroom was in someways very similar to Nigh, a comfort but it always made her sleepy. 

I’ve had about half an hour in the studio today, delighted to make chicken soup and take it over to T who has tonsillitis, I really need to be needed right now. 

My show opens tomorrow, it’s dragged on, been postponed, the waiting has added to this weird time but I’ve decided it’s time to throw myself back in. I’ve not touched my paints in weeks, instead just staying in the comfort of my sketchbook. I really want to paint a person but I’m completely terrified that it will be awful and I’ll undermine any confidence I have in my abilities. Am I overthinking? 

I can’t wait to visit you tomorrow I’m always inspired, will we paint or knit? Both I hope. I remember how precious time was when the girls were in school and care so thank you fro spending it with me. 

My reading is pathetic. I always choose knitting even though I have about four books on the go including a book I am reading for my book group, it’s a bit "queer Pubery Blues, I’ll be passing to the 19 year old when I’m done. I nearly bought Middlemarch yesterday but decided life is too short and I haven’t read all of Jane Austen yet which I do love to read on summer holidays, maybe because I can give her the time she deserves.

Ok, I’m off to meet a friend for an after dinner knit at a pub in Northcote and I need to wind a ball of wool. See you in the morning! 

x Stacey